Some Wonderful Definitions

Fantastic meanings...

CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco
rolled in paper
with fire at one end
and a fool at the other!

MARRIAGE:
It's an agreement
wherein
a man loses his bachelor's degree
and a woman gains her master's

CONFERENCE:
The confusion of one man
multiplied by the
number present

CONFERENCE ROOM:
A place where everybody talks,
nobody listens
and everybody disagrees in the end

SMILE:
A curve
that can set
a lot of things straight!

YAWN:
The only opportunity
some married men
ever get to open
their mouths

EXPERIENCE:
The name men give
to their mistakes

DIPLOMAT:
A person
who tells you
to go to hell
in such a way
that you actually look forward
to the trip

OPTIMIST:
A person who,
while falling from the
EIFFEL TOWER,
says midway:
"SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"

BOSS:
Someone
who is early
when you are late
and late
when you are early

POLITICIAN:
One who
shakes your hand before elections
and your confidence afterward

DOCTOR:
A person who kills
your ills with pills and
Later with his bills.